*Sigh*

This morning I was watching the news while making breakfast for hubs, and I saw a story about a little boy who was murdered in New Hampshire. Basically, the story goes like this: A three year old boy named Christian Jackson was killed by blunt force trauma, he died after being admitted to the hospital over the weekend. The mother of this child was already under investigation for hiding the fact that her young daughter had 17 broken bones, and was taken to Mexico for treatment. 17. Broken. Bones. The mother didn't have anything to say about that case on the news this morning, and the newscasters kind of treated it like an interesting side note. To me, it was heartbreaking. If this woman couldn't care for her children, why was she allowed to keep them? How was this toddler still in her custody? She says that the boy was with his father at the time, but I think that's a lame excuse. I think that if she loved her children, she would never, NEVER have allowed anything like this to happen to them. Now her son is dead. I don't know where her daughter is..hopefully somewhere far away from her, and whoever else her mother is associated with. I actually had a mini breakdown, and am starting to tear up again just thinking about how badly I want a child, and how unfair it is that women (and yes, men too) who are given this most precious of gifts just squander and abuse it. I wish I was rich, so I could take in all these kids and show them that family means love, help with homework and reasonable discipline, not bruises...not broken bones. And not death at the hands of the person who is supposed to protect you. Hubs and I have been trying for about 3 years to get pregnant, and while the doctors tell me that we're both healthy, and shouldn't have any problems..well..3 years is a long time to carry a wish in your heart. And when I see someone who has what I want so badly for myself...just waste it. It's not fair. I'm angry. And sad. I'm trying not to hate..but it's hard, so hard not to.

Sorry for being such a downer on a Friday. I can't even begin to think of a way to lighten the mood now.

RIP Christian Jackson. May your next trip down the road be longer, healthier and much much happier.

Duality in Nature? Ummm....ok

Work Mouth: A form of self-censorship practiced at work to avoid offensive or cuss words. Typically includes cuss-replacements you learned from your grandma. Potentially embarrassing if accidentally used outside of work at parties or in the company of your drunk friends.

May also be used in the company of grandparents, teachers, preachers, and others who disapprove of cussing.

Does not apply to all professions. Musicians and construction workers have no need for a work mouth.
At work:
-Did you just say fuck?
-Yeah, sorry. I forgot to use my work mouth.

At a party:
-Did you just say fiddlesticks?
-Yeah, sorry. I still have my work mouth on. 
*Urban Dictionary .com

Why do we feel the need to separate ourselves? When did it become necessary to have different faces to wear depending on the situation? I wonder these things, because I can't for the life of me remember where I put my "work face"...it's been too long since I had to deal with the general public for long stretches of time and honestly? I don't really want to find it. I would rather work someplace where I can be myself..my REAL self, cuss words and all. Here's hoping such a place still exists..
 OH! And my belated Valentine's Day gift arrived last night...my darling hubs got me a Kindle! So now I can keep collecting all the books I want without filling up our entire house! HOORAY!!

Have a great day everyone, and if your soap starts back talking..rub it on your butt. xoxo

Grrrr

WARNING: Men might not want to read this post, as I'll be talking about periods a bit and swearing..a lot.

I woke up angry this morning. Don't be alarmed..it happens about once a month. Yeah, it's that time and I hate it. I'll feel messy and gross for the next 5 days, and I'm gonna be pissed the whole time. I kinda of can't wait..there's something soothing in letting go and just being mad. I do hate to take out the aggression on hubs and little bro, so to them I will apologize in advance. But the bitch who stole my parking place at the market? Fuck you. The old man taking up the entire bread section? Fuck you too. Those pedestrians who persist in walking in the street, even though the sidewalks are cleared off? Oh fuck you my brothers...fuck you especially hard.  There, I feel a little better now. To calm myself down a bit, I'll go to the library today, and hopefully get a card, then I can start reading again and be less focused on how miserable I feel.
  On the heels of being pissed of is a wave of disappointment too. Hubs and I have been trying to get pregnant for almost 4 years now, and every time  I get my period I am forced to realize that we still haven't achieved that goal. I guess I shouldn't stress out about it, but I never wanted children of my own until I met hubs..and now that I do want babies, I can't wait for them to get here.
Gah, I'm going now to take some Midol..before the weeping starts and the cramps get much worse. Maybe later I'll introduce a new segment to the blog..something I'm calling "right before bed", in which I'll tell you all the funny shit hubs says right before we go to sleep.

Sweet Chocolate

 This was outside my apartment building this morning. Looks like someones not gettin any lovins today. Fortunately it was warmish..but still...Happy freakin Valentine's day, right? I think you'd have to pull something really shady to get this kind of special treatment on this of all days. Maybe someone forgot the flowers? My plans for Valentine's day aren't nearly as entertaining..I'm going to get the car details for the hubs, make an excellent dinner..I'm thinking steak of some kind, and his gift.
Before I show you what I've got for him though, a little background. My husband is a god when it comes to cooking. Friends on Facebook have seen pictures of his masterpieces, some of you have even eaten some. He speciality though, is the grill. Here's the grill we got him for his birthday:

                                                               OOO Shiny!

And here's his gift....(I have to admit,I'm a little proud of this...)

Yes, it is a mini grill!! Full of CANDY. AWESOME!!!!!I totally win at Valentine's day!! I can't wait for him to get home so he can see it and love me even more. (Also in this picture, my wrist puppy, some camels, and the gummy worms I filled the grill with.) I was going to write something serious and poignant about love today, but since I haven't slept yet, this is what you get. Ta Da!! Hooray! Now, if I could just summon up some love in the form of a nap, we'd be in business.

Really? Politics??

 Remember my last rant? The one about re defining rape? Here's the aftermath,,,in the form of an email I just received....

"Big news: Thanks in part to you and the 581,053 others who signed the "Redefining Rape?" petition, the Republicans are back-pedaling from their attempt to redefine rape.¹ Your support made a real difference.

But this legislation is still terrible for women. Rep. Carolyn Maloney called it "the deepest attack on a woman's right to choose in my lifetime."² Expert Jessica Arons said it would "accomplish the unstated end of making abortion as difficult to obtain as possible without actually criminalizing it."³

Among other things, the bill would effectively prevent women from using their own money to purchase insurance that includes abortion coverage in the new insurance exchanges. Experts warn this could lead to insurance companies dropping abortion coverage entirely.⁴

And it's only one part of the Republicans' attack on women's health. A second bill would allow hospitals to let a pregnant woman die rather than perform the abortion that would save her life.⁵

It's reprehensible. We can't let the GOP force women back into the back alley. You stood up against the disgusting "forcible rape" provision—now can you stand together to tell Congress to oppose these attacks on women's right to choose by signing the petition below?

http://pol.moveon.org/wontgoback/?id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=3

The petition says: "Stop the GOP war on women's health. Please oppose the bills that would restrict abortion coverage and erode a woman's right to choose."

On Tuesday, local MoveOn members in "We Won't Go Back to the Back Alley" T-shirts will deliver your petitions during a hearing on Capitol Hill. Anti-choice activists are sure to be out in full force at the hearing, so we need a huge stack of names to show Congress and the news media that voters won't stand for this attack.

These GOP bills are a full-throated attack on women's reproductive freedoms. Their legislation would:⁶

• Effectively ban abortion coverage in the new health insurance exchanges even if people pay for coverage with their own money.
  
• Impose tax penalties on small businesses that pay for health plans that cover abortion and people who pay for abortion care.
  
• Force the District of Columbia to impose all of the above laws, instead of letting the city decide its own laws.
• Permanently ban abortion care for women insured by the government.
  

And a recently added provision is perhaps the most disgusting: allowing hospitals to deny a woman a life-saving abortion. If this bill passes, hospitals will be allowed to turn away a woman seeking an abortion, even if she'll die without it—a major change from current law.⁷

Will you sign the petition today and stand up for a woman's right to choose?

Don't let the GOP send us back to the back alley. Sign the petition and share with your friends today:

http://pol.moveon.org/wontgoback/?id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=4

Thanks for all you do. –Kat, Eli, Milan, Carrie, and the rest of the team

Sources:

1. "House Republicans drop controversial 'forcible rape' language," CNN, February 3, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205960&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=5

2. "Democratic Reps. Unimpressed With New House Abortion Bill," Talking Points Memo, February 3, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205966&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=6

3. "Extreme Abortion Coverage Ban Introduced," Center for American Progress, January 20, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205961&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=7

4. "An Analysis of the Implications of the Stupak/Pitts Amendment for Coverage of Medically Indicated Abortions," The George Washington University Medical Center, School of Public Health & Health Services, November 16, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205972&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=8 (PDF)

"Study: Stupak Amendment Will Eliminate Abortion Coverage 'Over Time For All Women,'" Talking Points Memo, November 18, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205973&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=9

"A Quick Note on the 'No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act,'" Mother Jones, January 20, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205975&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=10

"Extreme Abortion Coverage Ban Introduced," Center for American Progress, January 20, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205961&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=11

5. "New GOP Bill Would Allow Hospitals To Let Women Die Instead Of Having An Abortion," Talking Points Memo, February 4, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205974&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=12

6. "Extreme Abortion Coverage Ban Introduced," Center for American Progress, January 20, 2011
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=205961&id=26019-18414111-Iak7QMx&t=13

7. "New GOP Bill Would Allow Hospitals To Let Women Die Instead Of Having An Abortion," Talking Points Memo, February 4, 2011
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/02/new-gop-law-would-allow-hospitals-to-let-women-die-instead-of-having-an-abortion.php.

Want to support our work? We're entirely funded by our 5 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here."

OK, do I even need to say anymore? Probably not..I'll write something funny later. 

Ch-ch-ch-changes?

So, here's something I noticed this morning...after I dropped hubs off at the train station, the sun was coming up. It's no longer dark as I sit here writing, and that can only mean one thing....spring is coming. Yes, yes, I know, there's still an asston of snow on the ground and more on the way. I know it's still cold as balls out there, and that the roads are crappy, sidewalks are slippery and your whole house smells like boots. But think on it for a second..if the sun is already up, it must mean that the days are getting longer. And if the days are getting longer then there will be more sunlight. *Sigh* it makes me happy just thinking about it. I wish I had my camera this morning so I could show you, but instead, here's a sunrise from Cali, where I saw it come up about 80% of the time....

That was my backyard. Gorgeous. The day (like most days in southern California) turned out to be perfect. I can't wait for the seasons to turn here, as that's something I really did miss. Although, since the sun is up I do feel like I'm a little behind schedule. Normally by now I've done more stuff. Oh well, at least I have a couple of weeks to adjust....

The Good Stuff

I'm getting into the spirit of Valentine's Day a little early this year. I've already started on hub's present, and I think he'll love it! Many thanks go to Little Brother for the idea, and help with the execution! I would tell you what it is, but hubs sometimes reads my blog and I can't have him finding out too early, now can I? Thinking about Love and such puts me a pretty good mood, as I'm sure it does for most of you. I don't want to get to sciencey or technical, talking about hormones and pheromones just kills the mood. I want to talk about the good stuff. The stuff that makes you realize how lucky you are in your choice of partner, the soft feeling you get when you laugh together, the pride you feel when they get something awesome done.
    My favorite part of the day is bedtime, and not just for the obvious reasons. Bedtime is when hubs and I have our best discussions. Bed it where we finally relax and talk about what REALLY happened during our day. Of course, sometime we just get silly and last night was a perfect example of that. (As an aside, I'm going to try to remember this as accurately as possible, sorry hubs if I exaggerate too much!) So we're laying there, snuggled up and warm under the blankets. Hubs asks me what's wrong, I say nothings wrong, I'm fine but he persists. (He always knows when I'm troubled! It's spooky) So I tell him about the bill I wrote about yesterday, and how it makes me a little sad and a lot scared. I had been expecting him to comfort me, or at least be outraged like I was. Instead, we have a debate about personal responsibility! I couldn't believe it! I was getting so mad! Infuriated even!! Had I made a huge mistake telling him about this??! Then I realized what he was doing..playing Devil's Advocate so I could work out my thoughts and be clear about why I felt the way I did.  Of course that ploy doesn't work if you know what's happening. He had to be serious about it so I could be serious too. That man is a sneaky genius sometimes, I'm tellin ya.
So, after I calmed down we got back to talking about nonsense, and I realized that I loved him so much for engaging my brain, I wanted to do something nice to show my appreciation. But he did this thing with his eyebrow...and I just lost it. (If you've met hubs, you know his eyebrows are quite mobile...but last night he did something where they completely changed shape. It was amazing!) I was laughing too hard to do anything but hug him and give smooches before going to sleep. I wish everyone could find their special person..I really think a lot of society's ills could be mended if more people were happy in their relationships. As a closer, here's my favorite picture from our wedding. Love to everyone today, tomorrow and forever! (soooo mushy! what is wrong with me today?!)

 

What the everloving hell is this shit?

 Oh how I wish this was another rant about douchbag neighbors, or the crappy crappy weather. But this is far more serious than anything I could make up to be pissed about. I'm so fired up I couldn't even wait until tomorrow to write about it. Here's the petition, with a link to sign if you're interested:

Subject: Help to stop the GOP plan to redefine rape

Hi,

 I just heard about a horrible GOP bill that could redefine rape and
set women's rights back by decades.

Here's the deal: Right now, federal dollars can't be used for abortion
except in cases of rape, incest, or when the woman's life is in danger.
But the bill, introduced by Republican congressman Chris Smith, would
narrow that use to "cases of 'forcible' rape but not statutory or coerced
rape."

As far too many women know, bruises and broken bones do not define rape -
a lack of consent does. This bill is scary - so I signed a petition
telling Congress to stand up and oppose the bill. Can you join me at the
link below?
http://pol.moveon.org/smithbill/?temp9

Right?? You're pissed now too, aren't you? If you aren't, than I hate you. For real. This is a frightening move by our government, and as a woman, I just can't believe that it's even being taken seriously. Maybe it's the 7&7 talking, but I doubt it. The thousands of women left battered and broken by acts of rape demand justice. My little brother is the one who told me about this. He was yelling something from his room, and when asked what the issue was, he could barely speak. I don't think I've ever seen him more pissed off. If this bill passes, no woman will ever feel safe again. I can pretty much guarantee that I'll start carrying a weapon, properly licensed and concealed, and I don't think I'll be alone. People are too crazy already without taking away the deterrent of criminal prosecution. I want to go outside and scream "Listen up motherfuckers, I'm a woman, and this is BULLSHIT!" If you feel even a little bit the same way, sign the petition. And if that doesn't work, join me in the inevitable march on Washington to protest. I imagine it will happen sometime in the spring. We could see the cherry blossoms.

Mansoon....

So, last night was quite eventful...for my phone. Hubs and I decided to watch a movie (Repo Men...it was pretty good) while we were eating dinner, and I..like an ass, left my phone in the bedroom. When we finished to movie, I had 7 missed alerts. SEVEN. That's more text and phone action than I usually see in a week. All in one night! Most of the missed alerts were texts, from my BFF Indigo and my other BFF Bambi. Indigo wanted me to know that a certain ghost from the past had gotten in contact with her, as soon as her new relationship status became public. I imagine his thought process went something like " Damn, I remember how awesome Indigo is, and she's single???!! I wonder if I can trick her with charm into paying attention to my penis....hmmmmm" Now, Indi and Casper (as I'll call him) had been in a relationship in the past, and things didn't work out. Mainly because Casper's a ghost and therefore has no substance. So for him to try to weasel his way back into her life makes me grit my teeth a little and contemplate a long drive in the snow to do some damage. To him. Or his car, which ever I can find first. See, as I mentioned before, I love my friends. I try to give good and hilarious advice whenever I can. But when words just won't cut it, dramatic shows of force are sometime needed. Thankfully, Indi isn't as impulsive as I am, so I am NOT driving helter skelter through a blizzard to plant a car bomb. Now...Bambi on the other hand, is going through a nasty breakup a hubs of her own. I've never met him, but the fact that he's giving up one of my favorite people makes me dislike him. Intensely. Bams sent me a text last night, to let me know that she's a magnet for inappropriately aged men, and their silly propositions. Specifically, a 20 something neighbor and an indecent proposal. Have to admit, I lol'd a little bit..replied it was because she's "hawt", (yes, I spelled it that way, don't judge) then we lol'd together. I mean, who doesn't want to be a sex goddess? Come on. You there in the back, I see you. You want to be sexxy too I know it..... Unless he was yucky... then by all means run for the hills.
Oh, the other messages were from my sister! Hooray!!! We had a surprise sleepover party because guess what? It's gonna snow. Again. At this point though I'm like "whatevs, I'm over it." All it means for me at this point is nap time, moving the car later and leaving early to pick up the hubs at the train station. Here's a comic I found that sums up my feelings about winter at this point....

I like how nonchalant the kitty is. Frolic little kitty, frolic.